'Twas two days hence Christmas. Not knowing whether I had used the word hence correctly, I proceeded with my post, wary of the increased scrutiny I may now face having abstractly addressed my own word choice. I then paused for a moment to drink a swig of Seattle Dark coffee before remembering where the fuck I was on my train of thought. Oh yes, the post I did or did not make. It is a strange thing, surely, that such a simple sentence can send oneself on an existential journey which belies the meaning of ones own existence. As I read back sir Terraform's assertion, first in my head, then aloud, then loudly aloud, then quietly aloud, I began to question what it all could possibly mean. How could a post I did not write be my worst post ever? Moreover, is that even the question I must be asking at this juncture? Had I written the post? How could I lack clarity in this matter? WAS IT the worst post ever???What could it all mean?
Questions. Questions that needed answering. I soon found myself sitting beside Gandalf in the catacombs of Minas Tirith, ancient scrolls strewn across tables in a manner befitting the desperation for which they were so hastily tossed aside. Faded images of memes could be seen beneath the faint glow of waning candlelight. Volumes of archaic text, everything from records of rent portfolios to the very core of what it means to be Halo. And yet the answers were not to be found. Then, just when hope was dwindling I found it -- the tome of the original forum posters! Surely here lied the answers. I blew off a layer of dust, and opened the cover to find an inscription which read:
"To all who have journeyed here, welcome. You will find you have already found that which you seek. What you need is already that which you keep. If you ask, you surely must know. If you know, then why are you here? How can you say that which you did not? But how can you know, that which you cannot? Now, go my child."
Well that was fucking weird, I admitted to myself. Yet, somehow the words resonated. I knew now what my response must be to the assertion that I had made my worst post ever.